When you’re going through high school and college, you’ve always got that friend that’s the designated one to talk to the police. You know, the guy that doesn’t drink and doesn’t smoke and, in short, is sober. My friend looked the part. Ricky Williams doesn’t.

The former/kinda running back who’s been suspended more times than Pacman says he may have been able to help if he was aboard Cedric Benson’s boat the other weekend.

“I think if I had come down, things might have worked out a little bit differently,” Williams, who is entering the final year of his contract with the Dolphins, told the newspaper. “I find I have a calming influence on people I’m around.

“As a high-level athlete, it’s just something that’s ingrained in me. I always think that if I’m there, things would be different. I can’t say how.”

This may be well and true, but that calming influence, it’s called pot, and when you bring it out around police officers, they don’t smoke it, they arrest you. Pretty much, Benson was better off getting his ass beat and pepper sprayed than having Ricky around.