I promised to take some time off betting the college ranks. I was cold. I couldn’t get anything right. Every game I bet, it went the other way. It was like someone flipping a coin in the air and me calling heads every time, for it only to land on tails ten in a row. What are the odds, ya know? Betting’s supposed to have some skill, and here I was, watching and analyzing games, and unable to win anything that was, in short, a 50/50 shot.

I’m back. I’ve watched this unpredictable college season — USC losing to Stanford, Cal ranked No. 2, BC No. 4 — and I think I have a grip on this whole thing.

So I’m going to bet four or five games this weekend. I’ve looked into it, and I feel confident again. Being confident in betting is important; it’s like baseball, kind of: Get on a streak, and it seems to stretch game after game. Hit a slump, and there’s nothing you can do to break it.

Here we go.

-Louisville(+10.5) @ Cincinnati: I know the Cardinal have struggled, but at the beginning of the season could you ever imagine Louisville being a ten point ‘dog, period, let alone to Cincinnati? Me neither. I know they’ve sucked. And they probably won’t win. But Louisville covers the ten-and-a-half.

-Georgia (-7) @ Vanderbilt: Take that UT game for what it’s worth, but remember this: Last year, the Bulldogs gave up 51 points at home to the Vols, and they weren’t that bad of a team. Past that, Vandy beat UGA on Homecoming last year, and that taste is still very fresh in every Georgia players’ mouths. 7 points? Try 21. I hate ‘em, but the Dawgs cover.

-Tennessee (-6) @ Mississippi State: I’m thinking the Vols’ mojo may be back. And even if it isn’t, last time I checked it doesn’t take a lot of mojo to beat The Rebels.

-Boston College (-14) @ Notre Dame: Being that they’re stepped on annually by Notre Dame, BC isn’t over-looking this game. Matt Ryan will toss 4 TD’s, which is 4 more than the ND offense will score. Eagles cover, win in a blowout.

I was half-drunk watching this game, but I remember clearly — or clearly enough to look it up on Youtube two days later — Mike Patrick’s comments about Britney Spears, which, even in a drunken haze, seemed to have come from nowhere. I can only imagine what the rest of the announcing crew said to him after frantically pushing the mute button. The game’s in overtime, Mike, and you’re talking about Britney Spears, for reasons I’m guessing we’ll never know.

How I’m doing:

Last week: 3-2
On The Season: 6-7

It’s been a rough year, but this week features can’t-miss games that I can’t miss on. Here’s a few I’d take, and a even a teaser to really spice things up (crazy, I know).

Oklahoma (-23) @ Tulsa: They beat Miami by more, and you have to think that Miami, bad as they’ve been the last few years, still has more talent than Tulsa. I know that game was in Oklahoma, but it’s not like Tulsa is exactly the Swamp. Sooners cover.

Georgia @ Alabama (-3): ‘Bama has an offense, a defense, and one of the best coaches in the nation, loyal or not. Georgia? They’ve got none of the above. ‘Bama rolls, wins by two touchdowns.

Penn State @ Michigan (+3): Mike Hart delivered on his promise last week, but that was against Notre Dame, who recently became a 1-AA school (there’s a thousand App. State jokes to poke at that one). The bad news for Michigan is that they’re not facing Notre Dame’s offense; the good news is that they are facing Anthony Morelli’s. The gift three is nice, but Michigan wins straight up.

Georgia Tech (-3) @ Virginia: Virginia barely beat UNC. And Duke. They lost to Wyoming. I don’t know what Vegas is thinking, but I’m betting. Jackets cover, win easy.

PS: Looking through this, I lied about the teaser. I don’t want to chance anything when I’ve got four guaranteed winners. You heard it: Guaranteed.

I’m a little on the hungover side. And when I say a little, I mean a lot.

Yesterday was the first real day of college football. My first day of college football is kind of a mixture of Bloody Marys, beer, fun and anger rolled into one. So writing this now, my motor skills aren’t at their best — I drank from noon yesterday afternoon until 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning. I’m hurting. Hurting very, very badly.

That said, I’m going to try and do a run down of yesterday’s games, at least what I remember of yesterday’s games. Here’s how my day went:

It’s a little after 1:00, and I’m watching Michigan State on ESPN2, absolutely dismantling UAB. I’m not surprised by this at all: Michigan State seems to jump out of the gates every year, only to lose their last six or seven games. They’ll do solid right up until the time they play Notre Dame and Charlie Weis sticks it in their hearts again. Then it’s a free-fall plummet through the standings, and we’ll all wonder the same question we wonder ever year: “With such a good offense, why does this team always suck?”

It’s sometime after 2:00, and I’ve gone through a couple Bloody Marys on an empty stomach. I realize if I keep up this pace, I won’t make it through the 3:30 GT/ND game. That said, fueled by Appalachian’s late lead over Michigan has me forgetting logic and responsibility, and I keep pounding them.

My friend calls me and tells me he’s about to his first of many parlays he bet on the day. He picked Miami to cover and someone else, who I can’t really remember.

Georgia Tech is about to kick off to Notre Dame. The “suspense” of who will be the starting quarterback is revealed just before this. My friend comes out from his room and tells us Appalachian has beaten Michigan.

That’s another celebratory drink.

It’s 16-0 at halftime of the Georgia Tech game. That’s a few celebratory drinks. I call my friend — the one with the twenty different parlays — because he’s a big Notre Dame fan. I tell him his team’s done, that Charlie isn’t really the Evil Genius everyone’s painted him out to be.

It’s the second half of the Tech game. We’re running away with it, and I’ve come to terms that the game’s over. Charlie Weis puts in Evan Sharpley, who goes 10-13 for 92 yards, and then is yanked in favor of everyone’s favorite Clausen. Young Jimmy goes 4-6 for 34 yards, but his accurate arm is much too late. It’s 33-3, and that’s the way the game ends.

This calls for champagne.

I flip over to the UGA game to find they’re not struggling as much as the so-called “experts” said they would. They’re pretty much running and passing all over Ok. State, who might need to be reminded that football teams do play defense. Occasionally, anyway.

The rest of the night is a blur. I watched the UT/Cal game for a while. . . I’m starting to get drunken rage as I see Cal able to do whatever they want on offense. UT needs those same classes Ok. State needs; with the tackling they had, they’ll be lucky to beat Vandy this year.

All in all, it was a fun day. Biggest upset was clearly App. State over Michigan, but the best part of the day for me was seeing Charlie Weis so confused and so lost during his press conference. He took responsibility for the team not being ready, but at some point — and that time may be coming soon — I think people need to start recognizing this guy as a coach who inherited an awful lot of talent and is now having to do it on his own. Notre Dame, I believe, will be fortunate to get five wins this year. Tyrone Willingham, in his third year, had more wins than that and was fired. We’ll see if Weis’ fate holds the same cards.

I’m looking forward to next week. I think LSU/VT is going to be an inredible game, and if it isn’t, it doesn’t really matter — this is college football, where every Saturday is a good Saturday.

A lot of blogs are doing this, so I feel I should jump in. And with the recent nothingness in sports, why not? When the top story from yesterday was a non-related dog stabbing, football posts become a must. Which brings me to this: Each day I will try and post major conference breakdowns for all you college fanatics out there. The Big Twelve, SEC and ACC will be broken into two parts, since there’s two different divisions. All other conferences will be done in whole. Today we’ll focus on the SEC East, tomorrow the SEC East. Monday we’ll pick up again and, I dunno, maybe cover the Pac 10; it’ll have to be a surprise.

I’ll have a ranking posted next to each team, and for the teams in conferences broken down by divisions, that ranking doesn’t represent the ranking for the division. . . it represents the ranking for the entire conference. On we go.

• Florida (1): They’ll be the best team in the SEC this year, and anybody from Baton Rouge who wants to argue, well, all I have to say is this: Les Miles. Urban Meyer has done nothing but great things since his arrival in Florida, and even if he’s paying players — there’s a lot of grumbling that Urban has to be doing something wrong — he’s still getting them. The defense loses a lot, but it’s hard for me to imagine that the offense is going to drop off with Tim Tebow and an older Percy Harvin. He’s smaller than Reggie Bush, sure, but also might be faster.
• Tennessee (4): The East used to dominate the SEC, but the tides have kind of turned. The Vols pretty much lost everything resembling a starting wide receiver, but David Cutcliffe has a knack for making decent players great; Robert Meachem, who had done nothing in two years before Cutcliffe, was nearly an All-American last year. Erik Ainge is a polished four-year starter, and the defense should be solid enough to squeak out some wins. With their only tough road games coming at Florida and at Alabama (they play at Cal, but that’s out of conference and, uh, also the Pac 10. . . you know, not so difficult), the schedule favors them. They play at Kentucky to fiinish the year off, which could be a harder game than normally expected.
• UGA (6): Yes, the Bulldogs will finish sixth overall in the SEC. Their defense will more than likely be in shambles, but being Georgia, and constantly pissing me off (I’m a Tech fan, remember?), they’ll manage to win enough close games to make me go crazy. Matthew Stafford will progress as a sophomore, and Kregg Lumpkin will handle the load at running back. After a 4-4 season last year in the SEC, Mark Richt could be under some scrutnity midway through the season.
• Kentucky (7): Hard to imagine that Kentucky will be a team to once again be wary of. The last time people gave a damn about the Wildcats? Well, it was the glory years of Tim Couch. The reason people won’t want to face them this year? Well, it’s pretty simple: Andre’ Woodson. He’s Michael Vick without the animal rage. With Florida, LSU, and Tennessee at home, you can pretty much count on one of them being upset.
• South Carolina (8): You have to root for The Ol’ Ball Coach, but, to be honest, his team just isn’t that good. He’s lost Ko Simpson and Sidney Rice the last couple of years, and they were two of the very few bright spots on this South Carolina team. Blake Mitchell gets in fights and doesn’t show up to practice, and their schedule is nothing to sneeze at: At Georgia, at LSU, at Arkansas, at Tennessee, and at North Carolina (yeah, the last one doesn’t seem too difficult, but people are really building up Butch Davis).
• Vanderbilt: The players here can at least say they got a good education. And a few of ‘em played with Jay Cutler. Hey, when you play for Vandy, you look for any positives you can find.